Thursday, May 15, 2014

The Legend of the Snowman


The story of the snowman begins one December night in 1997. Or was it 1998? Umm… not sure of the exact year. I think I was 12 or 13. Anyway, I had a couple of girlfriends over to spend the night. My mom had (and still has) a love of White Castle. I share this love with her. My friends and I were hanging out in my basement bedroom when my mom stuck her head in and asked “Who wants White Castles?! It was somewhat late, but she had to take one of my friends home anyway. So we ran through the drive thru before dropping my friend off. Now my friend lived in the same neighborhood as my mom’s boyfriend (now husband who we will call Schmoopie from here on out) and his daughter (Angie who is now my stepsister) happened to be one of the friends that was over that night. We passed by Schmoopie’s house dropping the friend off and noticed that he had his Christmas décor up. The décor included one hideously ugly light up snowman. Angie mentioned how much she hated that snowman and we agreed. It was time for that sucker to go! Much like Earl-the snowman had to die. We drove around the block and thought up our plan. Mom was going to park the getaway car and we were going to run in the yard, grab the snowman and put it on the back patio steps that lead into the house. That way when Schmoopie woke up and opened the blinds he would be face to face with the snowman. Well I think it needs mentioning that Schmoopie is very thorough. He had the snowman cord and extension cord taped with electrical tape pretty tight. It took us quite a bit to get that sucker undone, but after that our plan went off without a hitch. We giggled all the way home, ate our White Castle and fell asleep. 

The next morning Mom and I were going to drop Angie off at home. We get there and the snowman was GONE. Angie and I looked everywhere. In showers, under beds, everywhere. Schmoopie kept a straight face and refused to admit he even saw the snowman. We knew he was lying and couldn’t prove it! Then like 10 years later the snowman reappeared!!! I had recently moved back home and climbed in bed, rolled over and came face to face with the snowman! He was BAAACK! Since then he has appeared in showers, trunks of vehicles and has recently been making a few appearances at weddings. I snuck him into The Schmoopie Wedding in 2010 and he was at my wedding last summer. I absolutely love this funny tradition my family has and am happy to finally share it here.





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